She doesn't look evil...but she is.
Someone called me from the local humane society late last year and wanted to know if I wanted to “socialize” a weiner. He was apparently not happy there. Lots of growling and foulness. I was full of weiner gusto at that point so I said SURE! That weiner is now Fat Jack Black. We loved him so much we kept him. I think dog jail was what made Jack need socializing. He’s a big old hole digging, fish catching lap dog. We officially adopted Jack in January….Jack doesn’t like anyone except the immediate family. Jack also doesn’t like 2 year olds that grab his ears and get in his face. He bites them and then they have to go incognito. Now we put Jack up when company comes.
Right after Jack needed “socializing”, I got a call from another lady who had a stray weiner that had been running with a pack of pit bulls in the big city. Still really into my weiner rescue at that point, when asked if I can take him, I say HELL YES. I know it sounds crazy. Picking up a stray weiner that hangs out with pit bulls…he can’t be very nice. That little dog is Zim — he only has the one name. I don’t know why. Like Prince…or Madonna. Zim the pit bull companion weighs a whopping 8 pounds. I picked Zim up, took him home and immediately found a home for him with my dear friend Misty. Misty’s excited. She takes Zim home on a Friday. He’s good (except that incident where he peed on her leg in Pet Smart). Misty overlooks that. On Monday, she goes to work — BIG mistake, apparently. Zim ate holes through the sheetrock in Misty’s bathroom. Zim also had a Chi straightening iron cord for lunch. Needless to say, Zim was returned to me. Who can blame anyone for returning him? I get him back — he’s thrilled to be back. Everything was going smoothly except a weird sexual incident in the kitchen while my husband was eating his Cheerios — note to self: when a man is over the age of 50, he apparently doesn’t appreciate freaky dog sex acts in the kitchen at 6:30 a.m. – I’m only 35 so I thought it was funny. LOL. ANYWAY, Zim is fixed now. No more freaky stuff going on and he’s the best little dog ever. I’m glad he got returned!! He loves me more than anyone else on this earth. That’s always nice 
I know, he looks like Dobby the House Elf from Harry Potter.
As if that drama wasn’t enough for me, about 3 weeks ago, I got more weiners. Not just one this time, either. I got a couple. I got them from an animal shelter — they had been there a bit too long. Adoption for them wasn’t looking good, so here I come to save the day. Mind you, I drove 3 hours one way to save these weiners. Butch and Cinnamon. Perfectly cute affectionate weiners. Butch and Cinnamon are a bonded pair, so no separating those 2. I had to find someone to take them both. While I’m trying to find potential new owners, Butch and Cinnamon corrupt my other weiners and make them do bad things. It’s like they all got the pack mentality when they were running together. Butch and Cinnamon thought it would be fun to harass the neighbor’s Chow, and take the other 3 weiners along for fun. It was the poor chow vs. 5 weiners. $90 vet bill for me — poor Zim — he’s okay though. Butch and Cinnamon were living in the garage at this point. My husband said NO MORE WEINERS in the house peeing on the brand new hand scraped hard wood floors — he’s always ruining my fun and my opportunities to clean up dog pee. Butch liked to lift his leg on things in the garage and christen them. He also like to bark at night. Butch and Cinnamon, mostly Butch was making me really tired. The day before yesterday, Butch and Cinnamon got new owners. Yaaay. Butch didn’t want to leave. I think it was bittersweet for all of us.
In the pokey.
What have I learned from all of this? Weiner rescue is hard, and I think I’m retiring. The weiners wore me down after only 3 months. Am I a wuss, or what? Think long and hard before you rescue weiners, people. That’s all I can say.
